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[Jan. 18th, 2012|10:58 pm] |
I did 150 squats today. Incredible, I know. I'm going to have an arse of goblin steel. After that, 60 push-ups. Then I did 50 crunches, and now I feel like I might be sick. But I did all of that every day for the past week.
This witch = a beast.
I thought I'd give exercise a shot. It's more productive than getting drunk and taking my rage out on my furniture. I like it so far. My muscles feel all wiggly, but I'm in a decent good mood. It's not enough, though. A fight club would be fun, but that's probably illegal.
Tomorrow I might give running a go before work. I just hope that my neighbors like me enough to get me to the hospital if I end up having a heart attack. Smoking is very, very bad for you, kids. |
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[Dec. 18th, 2011|02:24 pm] |
Sometime in the night my cat decided that he wanted to decorate the house with toothpaste, shampoo and loo roll. It literally looks like he tried to string the loo roll up like garland, and there are shampoo pawprints all over the steps.
My cat is a dick.
But it took me a while to notice because it already looks like a volcano erupted in here.
So. Anyone feel like helping me clean this place up? I'll pay you. Please. I don't feel like being alone today. |
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[Nov. 17th, 2011|02:34 pm] |
[hexed very private to self]
Dear Dark Lord, I quit. I'm sorry.
Dear Alecto, it's been fun, but I'm done. Thanks for the memories.
Oh, how I fucking wish it was that easy. I feel like I'm gonna throw up even more now then I did before. I can't really concentrate anymore. I feel so reckless too, and out of control. Like I'm running head first into a wall and my feet either can't or don't want to stop moving until my brains are a bloody goopy mess on the floor.
I wish I had someone to talk to. I don't like doing it all on my own anymore.
And sometimes I wish they'd find out so I'd have one less thing to worry about. I don't even care if they torture me, kill me, or buttfuck my soul. Whatever happens, I just want it to end. |
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[Oct. 7th, 2011|11:14 pm] |
[hexed private to herself]
I'm so fucking sick of all of it. The pretending. The lying. The guilt. Oh my FUCK I can't take this guilt. I feel guilty for deceiving Alecto. Rationally, I know that she is evil and is a terrible awful person, but she's Alecto. I feel like an idiot for feeling guilty because of her. I shouldn't, but I do. And I hate myself for it. I don't really give a fuck about the rest of them. I wonder if she ever found out about the terrible awful things I'm feeling, would she be disappointed in me, or just furious? Probably just furious, since I'm the only one she has left now that Gavin is gone. Would she kill me, or just try to break me?
And I feel guilty because of Tristan. I'm part of the reason he has to hide. I don't want him to have to hide. I want to be able to live like a normal person, and not like a fugitive just because of the blood he has. Thinking about it makes me want to rip someone's throat out with my teeth. I miss him and I think about him way more than I should. He's the only reason I'm going out with my Snatcher group. If we find him while we're out, I will destroy them. I never want him to see that side of me, though. But what else could I do? I'm shitty at memory charms and if they lived, they could tell. Then we'd all be fucked.
Why doesn't he hate me? I would hate me, if I were him. I don't care about what happens to me. If I die, then what-the-fuck-ever. I deserve it after all I've done. But he doesn't deserve to die. He makes me feel like a monster.
Life was so much easier when I just didn't give a fuck about anything. I hate having all these feelings.
I hope I don't vomit again. Too much booze, too little food.
[/hex]
Things that suck about curfew #23: not realising that you don't have enough cigarettes to last the night until well after sundown.
I'd just go to bed and not worry about it until the morning, but, of course, I can't sleep. |
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[Sep. 8th, 2011|03:07 pm] |
hexed extremely private to self:
I now understand why there is a difference between a Snatcher and a Death Eater. Snatchers are fucking morons and couldn't catch a mouse with wonky legs in a damn hand bag.
That witch would have gotten away last night if it hadn't been for me. They need to learn how to keep their aim when they run. But the question is, do I really feel like playing professor to them? Fuck it. Ill decide later.
Then again, if they're stupid, they'll be easier to fuck with if I need to.
I think the one wants to ask me to train him up to become a proper dark wizard. I don't want to be anyone's Alecto.
/hex
THE LEAVES ARE FALLING! THE LEAVES ARE FALLING!
My back garden is like a sea of orange and green! |
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[Aug. 23rd, 2011|05:39 pm] |
My birthday is in a few hours. I'll be 26.
I'm getting old. |
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[Jul. 15th, 2011|08:43 pm] |
hexed EXTREMELY private to Tristan Harper:
So I was thinking. Say that the war ends as it should, and I somehow escape with both my life and my freed
If I died would you
I had a drea
Hi. Hello. How are things?
/hex
Totally missed my dad's birthday this year. So I'm taking the day off work tomorrow so he and I can spend some quality father/daughter time together. I stopped after work today to get him a big bottle of his favorite fire whiskey.
I just hope it doesn't rain. |
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[Jun. 27th, 2011|04:39 pm] |
I know I probably shouldn't admit to this, but this feeling is so new to me that I can't help myself.
I really love my job today. Love it more than I ever have before. Love it like a pyro loves setting shit on fire. Kind of makes me wish I could have stayed there all day.
Now I just know though that I'll have to deal with some kind of horrible hell tomorrow, because today was so good. But fuck it. I'll take it when I can get it. |
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[Jun. 26th, 2011|08:59 pm] |
two years later....
Waterford, Ireland |
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[May. 15th, 2011|08:00 pm] |
It really chaps my arse when I see someone getting ganged up on. It's one thing if you want to fight someone. But when you and all your mates start beating on one person? That's just not okay in my book and that's when I get mad and decide you need a good beat down. That happened last night. Outside a bar three blokes started beating up on one bloke. No idea why. But since it got me mad, I joined in.
Afterward I had a bloody lip and that cocksucker, the one I helped, had the nerve to call me a cunt. You'd think he'd be glad that I stopped them from turning him into a bloody mess on the sidewalk, but no, I'm a cunt.
So answer me this: why the fuck do men have such an issue with women defending them? I know he wouldn't have been mad about it if I had a pecker. We probably would have went inside and had drinks as we toasted our victory. Because our side totally won. I only ever lose a fight when I'm too blitzed to punch in the right direction. |
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[Apr. 24th, 2011|01:51 pm] |
Another Christian holiday, another 'Jesus Saves' flyer stuck on my door.
This shit is seriously getting fucking old. |
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[Apr. 5th, 2011|10:24 pm] |
Some people have nightmares about giant snakes eating their legs, or being chased by Inferi with ooze dripping out of them. What did I have a nightmare about when I took a nap today?
Being pregnant. And I actually woke up in a cold sweat, panting and shaking. Granted, I was pregnant with devil spawn, but still...
I don't even want children sub-consciously. I might as well just have myself fixed now and get it over with. |
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[Feb. 4th, 2011|01:22 pm] |
hexed extremely private to self:
Fuck, I need my arse kicked. Bad. Like now. I'm going soft. Looking forward to it. Who the fuck says that?
And I offered to teach him a few of my tricks. Even better. I might as well just hang and quarter myself because this is probably totally treason and it would be a lot less painful if I do it myself. I'm so going to be eviscerated ten different times and ten different ways if He or She or Both find out about this.
Eviscerate. That's a good word.
/hex
My likeness is going to be forever immortalized riding a unicorn. The likeness of me that hangs out in Tierney's head, anyway. I can't even say how happy that makes me. In a few hundred years, I'll be like Gryffindor's Fat Lady. Except that I won't be hanging out in a school since I'll be naked. And I won't be singing. I probably won't be moving around either.
So. Valentine's Day is coming up. Fun. |
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[Jan. 9th, 2011|11:27 am] |
hexed private to Tristan:
Once things finally cool down at the hospital, can I come over or can we go somewhere so I can play with Emmett? If he wouldn't mind being away from his new puppies, that is.
/hex
The crazy old bitch down the hall threw a bible at me this morning. It hit me in the knee. So I threw it right back at her and it hit her on one of her old, saggy tits. She needs to learn that you can't fucking go around throwing bibles at people and get away with it. Especially after they just worked a long shift at the hospital and they're tried and hungry.
Makes me wonder, though. |
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[Dec. 25th, 2010|03:15 am] |
( hexed extremely private to self )
hexed to St Mungos staff:
I know that I'm just a lowly mediwitch, but if any of you want to leave and see your loved ones for the holiday and need someone to replace you for a little while, I'm offering myself to take your place.
I may not be a proper Healer, but I still know what I'm doing.
/end
Happy Christmas. |
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[Dec. 18th, 2010|05:38 pm] |
hexed private to self:
I've never doubted him, but after the epic failure yesterday I can't help it. It was a week between the time I heard about the task and when we went on that mission. The goblins should have been decimated the day they questioned Lovegood. Maybe then the item would be His and we wouldn't have had to retreat like nancys. Not that my opinion matters. I'm just a grunt who does what she's told.
At least it wasn't my idea to run away. I could have stayed there fighting until they killed me.
/hex
As of twenty minutes ago, I have the next two days off. Not like I get to do anything fun, though. I think I have a cold. All I want to do is sleep and eat soup. |
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[Dec. 2nd, 2010|06:19 pm] |
If you tell someone that you're not planning on celebrating Christmas they think you're a bitch.
That is, until you explain that the reason why is because you're whole family is dead. Then they just pity you.
I'd rather be considered a bitch then be pitied.
I've always rather liked Christmas. But it's no fun to fucking celebrate by yourself. |
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[Nov. 22nd, 2010|01:08 pm] |
hexed to Tristan Harper:
So how about you give me another tattoo? I was thinking a lion this time. On my thigh, I think. That's probably the only place where I have enough room at this point.
/end hex
My journal is wasted. I hardly ever use it anymore. |
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[Nov. 8th, 2010|11:52 am] |
A medi-witch's work is never done.
hexed to self:
Last week I had to help a man I tortured.
My gran always told me to pick up after myself.
/end hex
And expresso is her best mate. |
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[Oct. 28th, 2010|02:32 pm] |
private to self:
Now I'm thinking about people lining up to give blowies to the Dark Lord.
He probably won't like these thoughts.
Exxxxxxxcellent.
/private
Been reading the tales of that great Bard Beedle again. I wonder if the Wizard With the Hairy Heart was someone real? |
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